Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Top 10 Ways To Know That You're Proud As a Devil

10. Coming home from that great sermon on pride, you race down the highway, cutting people off and blessing them with "the bird".

9. The church you attend has a lot of healthy, wealthy, good-looking folks like yourself, and of course, it's the best church anywhere!

8. You're a fantastic conversationalist, with three well-developed themes: "Me, Myself and I."

7. The last time you gave someone a complement you said, "Well, thanks. You're not so bad yourself"... that was back in 1967 (you were in first grade).

6. No one preaches a better sermon on humility than you. No one!

5. As it turns out, you're always right-- it just comes naturally (well, there were a few times that you seemed to be wrong but actually there were mitigating circumstances, and ...

4. You act humble approximately half the time-- so people won't know you're proud.

3. Demons think you're swell and look forward to hanging out with you...for a very long time.

2. Satan has a nickname for you: "My Big-headed Dupe".

1. When a fellow Christian tells you I'm going to "seek the Lord" about a decision, you say, "OK, my son (or daughter), I'm listening".

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